"Are you trying to mug me off you small bastard? I'll mug you right off if you're trying to mug me off. You mug. You're fired!...Prick"
Junior Apprentice – Lord Sugar starts shopping in the kids department.
There has been something missing from this springtime. Something vital which I have been struggling to put my finger on. No, not sunshine and blue skies. Not that feeling of optimism that summer is just around the corner. Not even Bill Oddie getting overexcited about varying species of Tits. No. What has been truly missing from this springtime: a group of over confident, sweating, verbally incontinent “business” folk all vying for the approval of that adorable little potty-mouthed teddy bear Alan Sugar. Huzzah, The Apprentice is back, and this time it’s gone Junior!
Alice pictured with Cheshire Cat in Wonderland sometime in the 1940's
An impatient white rabbit with a watch-fob lures a young girl down an impossibly large rabbit hole where, upon defying the simple laws of gravity by evading the impending splatter of her body on whatever may be lying in wait for her at the bottom, lands safely and embarks on many whimsical adventures. During her journey, the girl encounters growth, shrinkage, anthropomorphic playing cards, floating cats, and an excess of cups and saucers. As things begin to seem all too familiar, she ponders to herself “Have I seen this all before?” Yes dear, we all have, so many times. This is ‘Wonderland’ and you are Alice.
Skins: A shower of bastards?
“Pah! Nuts to continuity! We don’t want it to be believable, we want it to be edgy and cool! Who needs character motivation anyway?! As long as they smoke a lot and remain unwashed then people won’t care that we’re just making it up as we go along!”
Possibly a direct quote from the head writer of Skins.
Bubo missing from 2010's Clash Of The Tit-Heads
There are no new ideas any more. This is what Hollywood is telling us. All humanity’s ideas were used up sometime in the last few years and have left us all scratching our collective heads about what we should do to entertain. That is until the next visionary with truly unique thinking and ideas is born from whom we can bask in their creative glory. Until then however, we as a species shall just remake everything that was made before but with a sneaky and rather clever twist. We shall make everything slightly worse. Example 1.A. the 2010 Clash Of The Titans remake.
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